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Comparing the Dodgers' Foes to Star Wars Villains

Round 2! Another slow day for news, so I'll be comparing the greatest enemies of the Dodgers in the past two years to Star Wars villains.


Nolan Arenado - Emperor Palpatine. He's just always, "there." He won't go away, and always seems to hit a home run off Buehler, Kershaw, Baez, or whomever, and consistently has great seasons and seems to never fall into slumps, and when he does, the Dodgers roll around for him to bust out of it, returning from the Dead in Emperor-esq fashion. Whether it be at Coors Field or Dodger Stadium, Arenado is always up against the Dodgers at the worst moments, and more often than note, he delivers. "I am the senate!"


Paul Goldschmidt - Darth Vader. More menacing a threat the Arenado, but ultimately less powerful and pesky. While he is now mostly out of the Dodgers' minds since he was traded to the Cardinals last offseason, Goldschmidt is still an incredibly powerful threat, just one who's now farther away and one whom the Dodgers see less. His name still silences the room in the Chavez Ravine System, but no longer are fans constantly fearing his power. "Embrace the power of the Dark Side of the Force."


Bryce Harper - Boba Fett. While his name is feared throughout the galaxy, he never really does all that much. Harper is a force (pun intended) to be reckoned with, but the Dodgers usually emerge from confrontations with him relatively unscathed. Moreover, he has done significantly less damage against the Dodgers than other teams. A feared name, but a pushover, at least so far, against the Dodgers. "He's no good to me dead."


Madison Bumgarner - General Grievous. He looks scary and has a terrifying reputation, but he's not really all that good or skilled. Just as Obi-Wan dispatched of Grievous with relative ease after years of battling, the Dodgers, while having their grapples with MadBum over the years, disposed of him in unceremonious fashion this year, with Muncy's quote absolutely shredding him to pieces and then, in his next start against them, the Dodgers totally railing him.


Eric Lauer - Darth Maul. This one is sort of perplexing, because nobody can figure out who he is or why he is so dangerous. Lauer, like Maul, unprecedentedly baffles the Dodgers every time they face him and seems immensely powerful, but he is a relative unknown and has been taken care of quickly as the Pirates shipped him off to the Brewers. Personally, I'm glad we didn't have to see him demonstrate his force-sensitivity anymore. "Darth Maul has no quotes"


Others: Gerardo Parra - Count Dooku, Charlie Blackmon - Jabba the Hutt, George Springer - The entire Clone Army

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